"My husband is a senior banker. I am responsible for his success"
I am the wife of a very senior investment banker. I have been married to this industry for nearly two decades, and we have two young sons.
Without me, my husband would be nothing. I stuck with him while he was working 120-hour weeks and I stuck with him throughout the years of travelling six days a week. I have been to innumerable client dinners and drinks, and I have been to all the conferences year after year. They are not his clients, but our clients. I have nurtured and cultivated those relationships over a long period as my husband has moved between banks.
A lot of people in banking don't understand the role that a spouse plays. Banking is an aggressive industry where broken marriages are common, but clients don't come from that world. Clients will choose to work with bankers they can empathize with, who seem to be like them. This is why if you're a male managing director, it helps to have a wife to soften your approach. If you've been with your wife for decades it's even better - you look you're a relatable family man, even if you're actually not.
Along with this direct role helping my husband bring in clients, I've also single-handedly raised our sons while he works almost continuously. This has not been easy, particularly as I've also cared for my husband who is a complex and depressive character with a reliance on alcohol and prescription medications. I manage his moods and help him deal with the stress of his role. It is not easy. I gave up my own career for this and apart from the children, I regret that. It is a full-time and often thankless job. Wives should have bonuses too.
Nadia Vernier is a pseudonym
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