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Thousands of people are now employed on this thankless task at Goldman Sachs. And a spreadsheet has gone missing at UBS.

Morning Coffee: Goldman Sachs has thousands of people doing this interminable job. Mystery spreadsheet at UBS

Goldman Sachs is hiring technologists. In February, Lloyd Blankfein said technology headcount at the firm has risen 8% in the past four years - especially in its designated "strategic locations" like Mumbai, Salt Lake City and Warsaw, where headcount's up 31%.

So, what are all those technologists doing?

Damian Sutcliffe, Goldman's EMEA technology head and global chief of operations technology, says "1,000s" of people in his team are engaged in the Sisyphean task of providing data to regulators. It's an area that's, "continuing to accelerate," says Sutcliffe. And it's not just about furnishing the regulators with the same data over and over: there are a "large amount of rule changes" and the regulator has "expectations of perfection."

This might sound a bit tedious if you've been contemplating working on internet balloons and self-driving cars at Google, but Goldman has methods of mitigating any disappointment. "We have a focus on onward progression of pay, while in other places you might stay on your entry salary, or thereabouts," says Sutcliffe. "At senior levels, I wouldn't have said we were un-competitive, maybe even more on the upside." He adds that Goldman is also launching a work from home initiative for its technologists. - Some jobs will be "almost fully from home, and others two to three days in the office."

Separately, what became of the LIBOR spreadsheet at UBS? The mythical document is playing a big part in the latest LIBOR-related trial of Arif Hussein, a former UBS junior sterling rates trader. It also has implications for the validity of the sentence given to Tom Hayes, the ex-UBS LIBOR trader imprisoned for 14 years. The alleged spreadsheet contained information about Hussein and other traders' positions and their exposure to LIBOR rates. Hussein's lawyers are arguing that the spreadsheet proves that UBS had a firm-wide inappropriate policy of checking traders' positions before making their submissions as part of the process of setting LIBOR.


The new approach is to make the bankers get into the regulators' heads, to fill banks with people who spend so much time worrying about bankruptcy that those worries bleed into the banks' regular operations. (BloombergView) 

Goldman bankers in London gave £23m of their pay to charity. (Evening Standard)

If Britain leaves the EU, there will be 10% fewer finance jobs in London by 2020 than there will be if stays. (Guardian) 

Deutsche traders will be off to Frankfurt. “It would be odd to trade European government bonds and foreign exchange in the non-EU branch of a German bank in London,” said John Cryan. (Financial Times) 

675 people are being urged to voluntarily leave BNP Paribas' corporate and investment bank in France. (

Seems Robert Shafir, ex-head of the U.S. business at Credit Suisse, is about to team up with Brady Dougan. (WSJ) 

J.P. Morgan just hired Ken Foley from BAML to run European high yield. Foley ran the EMEA high-yield and leveraged loans capital markets team at JPM previously, but left in May 2015 to become BAML's co-head of leveraged finance EMEA. (Bloomberg) 

The Chicago Mercantile Exchange will be shutting its New York trading floor this year. (Finance Magnates) 

Over the last five years, Bank of America shares are roughly flat, compared with a rise of about 37% in shares of J.P. Morgan Chase & Co. (WSJ)

Never touch the seat pockets on a plane. Or the in-flight magazine. (Business Insider) 

Hey Bernie, I'm a banker and a liberal Democrat: Stop saying people like me are part of the problem. (NY Daily News) 

"Hedges have underperformed, costing us millions. Let them sell their summer homes and jets, and return those fees to their investors." (Reuters)

When humans are better than robots, UK active managers’ edition. (Modern Investor)

Confessions of a baseball player: ""I'm actually a licensed stockbroker. I work for a company called Wunderlich Securities in the offseason and do money management." (SportsonEarth)

Photo credit: Bucks Furnace by Don O'Brien is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

AUTHORSarah Butcher Global Editor

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