DESPERATE MEASURES: Why I have resigned, with absolutely nothing lined up
Like the dizzy blonde early on in every horror movie, I am ignoring the spooky music and walking down the dark staircase to the cellar. Or, to put it in other words, in the worst hiring climate in decades, I have resigned from my job with nothing lined up to move on to.
To put this in context, neither I nor anyone whose bank account I have access to is independently wealthy. I have all the usual expenses (including children) and a sushi and sauvignon habit that takes care of anything that might be left over.
So why jump? Well, largely because after 15 years of working in investment banks with and for people who stretch the definition of the word 'difficult', I finally came across someone I really cannot work for.
A combination of limited communication, significant volatility and often barely disguised aggression left me paranoid, doubting my abilities and increasingly less able to protect my direct reports from the excesses of his behaviour. Add to this the constant sniping at everyone in the group, the stories that would be told behind people's backs and the ongoing lack of job security felt by everyone and I had little choice but to leave.
I have never worked in a less pleasant environment. Towards the end of last week, I realised that I was finally so miserable that the stress and uncertainty of unemployment would be preferable and I resigned.
I'm not leaving immediately. I have agreed to stay on for a week or two to finish off a few things and I suspect that attempts will be made to change my mind. The fact that I have agreed to come back in and tie off loose ends seems to be sending mixed messages and allow an 'it'll all blow over if I keep my head down' mentality.
Fundamentally, however, this is about personalities. It would be nothing short of foolish to expect this particular leopard to change its spots for long.
I will miss my colleagues enormously, after all there is nothing like shared adversity to create a bond, but the surge of relief I felt once I'd made and acted upon my decision means I'm sure I'm doing the right thing. I've started sleeping again; I no longer dread getting up in the morning; and my stomach doesn't sink when the phone rings.
I've never been unemployed before and it's not an experience I'm relishing. I may quickly regret taking such a ridiculous risk. I may look back and believe that I could have put up with the nonsense for the sake of a monthly salary cheque. At this point, who knows? I may be at the bottom of the darkened staircase and about to open the cellar door but I am hopeful that when I do I'll find a light switch.
In the meantime, does anyone know a good head hunter?
